Nightmare

Under the water,
Cookies fly through the air,
A scientist sings a song,
The pirate finds the treasure.
Here I am,
Cuddling with a dinosaur.

In the garden,
Pigs sail a boat,
A monster digs a hole,
The old king sleeps soundly.
Here I am,
Staring down a hotdog.

In the castle,
Farmers chase the dog,
The horse starts to fly,
The artist paints with blood.
Here I am,
Making hair dye out of toothpaste.

Under the bed,
The ball sits.
Trash lies.
Miscellanious objects rest.
Is this supposed to be the remains of discarded dreams?

Time to wake up,
It's the morning.
Everyone knows it's a school day.
Everyone forgets their dream.

It's all too quiet,
Yet all too loud.
Much too quickly,
But very slowly.
Mysteriously obvious.

Look out!
Dream storm coming through!

On top of the bed,
My bed,
Is me.

Sleeping.

A Drop of Love

Outside the car window
He smiles and waves at me
In just one moment
We're in unity

The car passes on
I'm still here chewing my pen
Thinking about that moment
The feeling that I won't forget

Outside the window
Is a world of shattered dreams
Ideas that never happen
Everything that's let go way too soon

I'm in love with an idea of a person
Dreaming of things that will never be true
Overwhelmed by my emotions
And there's only one person who could feel what I feel

But the love; it never happens
I'm chewing on my pen
There's a fork in the road that separates us
No matter how similar we are

Outside the window
Could have been something new
I could be smiling stupidly
But just cuz they told me to

Here painful memories grip me
Why can't I let things go
Some thoughts are all too vivid
Is it helping me to cry

And they all say he was a human
They all say we had no clue
He don't know me and I don't know him
But do they say anything else

Suppose we shared a moment
Caught between two worlds
Maybe it's best to remain where I am
Jealous and in love

The car keeps rolling
Clocks keep ticking
Static through and through
Still taking every last bit in my head

And suddenly I throw the pen
Step outside the car
He understood me and I understood him
He couldn't have gone that far

But he did
And we're never gonna make it
So much to take in
I'm in love

If we felt the same
If I knew him truly
If time let us share that day
Is our love just cuz of sympathy
Or is love simply who we are?

Mechanization

Mechanization

I live my life day by day
Unaware of my surroundings,
Not looking up from my personal thoughts.

Routine and plan control me.
I think and dream ideas that make sense only to me;
I can't express them with words.

I keep emotion to myself,
Lie frozen on the bathroom floor;
I don't dare be myself.

In the midst of reality my life becomes chaos.
I finally admit that I'm different.
Maybe it's what I've always wanted,
Not to be human.

I defend criminals and stop judging others,
Bring back the idea that the world is flat,
Try to be more open than most.
People don't take me seriously.

I am human,
And so are my friends.
We exist in a society that's figuratively dying,
Concealing ourselves to appear perfect,
Changing the definition of human to machine.
I yearn to live.

But I am human.
When I look at myself, routine clouds my vision,
Shadows are cast on the monster in the mirror,
The coward who is scared to be different,
Yet scared to be the same.
I look at my friends,
Smearing on lipstick and analyzing their looks,
Inviting me to join them before the school bell rings.
I wish it wasn't so hard to move upstream.

It's we who have destroyed the freedom,
Shrunk our imaginations,
Hidden the truth,
Hypnotized ourselves,
So that we might never truly feel again.

My Blue Crocs

Breezy August is care-free
Filled with giggles and music
Friends and freedom
Playing in the sand
Walking on soft grass
In my blue crocs
Once summer is over
I put them away
On a shelf
In my attic.

School starts
In September
Melt-downs in gym
Drama with friends
Secrets that change your life
That empty feeling
Which you can never understand in books
I can finally relate
My crocs sit on the shelf
Dust piles on.

An all-nighter birthday
Begins October
With laughing
And obsessing over TV
Worries about school work
The dread about the night
That will change my life forever
My crocs sit on the shelf
Dust piles on.

Holloween
Begins November
With the constant telling myself
It's the last day of October
But I still have time
And I really don't
Because I change
From black to white
No one
Really understands
And time keeps ticking
While I am stuck
In a moment
My crocs sit on the shelf
Dust piles on.

Coming back
From Thanksgiving Break
Begins December
The constant wish
That things can change back
And then the realization
That they won't
I just can't get over it
The dread of the thing
That isn't that bad
And the happiness
Of realizing the change
Was for the better
And the idea
Of starting the New Year
With a new horse
And new freedom
My crocs sit on the shelf
Dust piles on.

A New Year's party
Begins January
The constant smell
Of horse poop
Laughter in the lunchroom
School stress
Without a mirror reflection
My crocs sit on the shelf
Dust piles on.

Valentine's Day
Begins February
Stress of being single
Not fitting into the crowd
The girls laugh
At how I dance
And my crush
Doesn't even notice
Adults say
I'm just not trying
And again
No one understands
My crocs sit on the shelf
Dust piles on.

A beautiful ride in the rain
Begins March
The month
Of family hatred
That makes you question
How people
Can be so shallow
How people
Can know anything
For certain
How people
Can say the words
Not possible
And that saying stupid human
Is being redundant
Again they say
Scientists prove it
But who are we
Compared to animals
My crocs sit on the shelf
Dust piles on.

Spring Break
Begins April
I consider
Running away
But I never get past
The door
I just don't know things
Anymore
Like I used to
And I feel like
All I'm good for
Is dreaming
My crocs sit on the shelf
Dust piles on.

Final exams
Begin May
I look back
And ask
If I really changed
Sudden urges
For chocolate truffles
To shut the lights out
To run barefoot
My crazy ways
Of loving horses
And saying words
Like seriously
It's good
Simply knowing
That some things
Always stay the same.

I take my crocs
Into the June summer breeze
Dust scatters off
Into the open
And my crocs
Are blue again.

It's
A new season.

Good Bye (Jingle Bells)

This is a song I wrote for my pen pals when I had to go. Happy holidays!

You guys I have to go
It was fun chatting today
And you might be like NOO
But I'll come back to say

I love you guys so much
You make me feel so great
You have the magic touch
I'll be back not late

Check your Dells, check your Dells
Email's on the way
I'll come back to chat with you
And you chat back, say hey!

Pure Happiness

Tingles and shivers in my body
Bubbles of excitement pop and just make more
Crawling spiders carry energy all over me
Half of me wants to drive the feeling out
And the other half wants to leave it there pulsing
For the sake of time, the second half wins

I count down the hours and the minutes
Not able to concentrate on anything but my excitement
Everything is so slow and I'm in auto-pilot
Why can't I just get a jump-start and transition like in the movies?

At last I'm down to the last few seconds
Three, two, one and the curtain of waiting peals back to reveal pure joy
My horse is standing there ready to ride
I climb on and everything in me explodes
I'm riding without a worry or care
I'm free

The breeze flows through my hair
It's as if the rain is cleaning out my human soul
And pouring in thoughts of peace and love that no one else seems to ever think
Right here and now I'm here to love with open arms and to be happy despite anything
To giggle away my anger and to ride my heart out

I think to myself, this is what I've been waiting for
I realize that this is better than anything else
Any material item, any dumb hot guy, any of soceity's idols
This is what keeps me alive

Riding my horse feels amazing
I'm unstoppable and uncontrollable
I question if, with my pure joy and wonder, if I'm even part of the human race
Why oh why can't this last forever?

Stupidity

It's stupidity that makes us dependent
On food and on water and all that darn electricity
On people to help and people to lean on
Just plain luxury makes up our artificial world
And what's going to happen when it all collapses?

It's stupidity that makes us gullable
To the government, to religion, to supposed superiors
To all the certain facts you learn in school
We just assume and let our minds play tricks on us
And what's going to happen when the apple floats upward?

It's stupidity that makes us look from the outside
At people, at fiction, at the whole wide world
At all the little situations that happen
We try to make everything black and white
And what's going to happen when we find our soulmates?

It's stupidity that makes us monsters
To the planet, to the world
Destroying everything with whatever
Why do anything if you're going to lose it all?